couple exploring different intimate positions

Best sex positions

69 vs. other oral positions: an honest comparison

By Dr. Vivian Holloway

Published: 27 Feb 2025

Let's talk about something many of us find a bit… awkward. Sex. Specifically, oral sex. And, hey, let's be real, figuring out what feels good to you and your partner takes some exploration! This isn't a judgment-free zone, it's a judgment-celebratory zone! We're diving into 69 vs. other oral positions to help you find the best fit for you and your partner. So grab your beverage of choice (maybe something bubbly?), settle in, and let's get to it!
couple enjoying intimate moment

couple enjoying intimate moment | Image: Supplied

The Infamous 69: What is it, Really?

Okay, so for anyone new to the game, the 69 position involves simultaneous oral sex. Partner A performs oral sex on Partner B, while Partner B reciprocates. Simple, right? Wrong. It's actually more complicated in reality than it sounds in theory. It can be amazing, or it can be a total flop. You need to find out what works best for you, and that might take some trial and error. This is super important to remember! Don't feel pressured to do this if you don't want to. This isn't a competition, its about pleasure.

Pros: The obvious one is the mutual pleasure aspect. If it's done right, it can be super satisfying for both partners, leading to a heightened experience. Plus, that feeling of intimacy, connection...it can be electrifying!

Cons: It's not always comfy. It requires some coordination (like, a LOT of coordination!), and sometimes it can be a bit awkward or feel unnatural, especially at first. It's all about communication and finding the right angle! Also, keep in mind hygiene, because its super important!

couple engaging in 69 position

couple engaging in 69 position | Image: Supplied

Alternative Oral Positions: Exploring Other Options

Don't get me wrong, the 69 has its place, but it's not the end-all, be-all of oral sex. In fact, there is a huge variety of oral sex positions that can be incredible too.

  • Spooning: This is super intimate and is great for both partners.
  • Facing each other: This allows for more eye contact and facial expression.
  • Side-lying positions: These can be more relaxed and comfortable, which is a huge plus if you find 69 a little awkward.
  • Woman on top: This might be a great option if you are looking to take control.
  • Man on top: This might be a great option if you are looking to be more relaxed. It's truly amazing the variety of positions out there!
various couples engaged in different oral sex positions

various couples engaged in different oral sex positions | Image: Supplied

Communication is Key: The Secret Ingredient

Seriously, this is more important than anything. Open, honest communication about what you like and don't like, what feels good, and what doesn't is absolutely crucial for a positive experience. Don't be shy! I know it's easy to get embarrassed, but it's okay to communicate your boundaries and desires. If it hurts, say it! If it feels awkward, say it! The key to any sexual experience is to make sure both parties involved are feeling comfortable. You won't be disappointed if you try to communicate as much as possible. Its really that important!

Consider using this:

  • Check-ins: Regularly ask your partner, "Does this feel good?" or "Is there anything I can do to make this better?"
  • Experimentation: Be open to trying different things and adjusting positions as needed.
  • Consent: Remember, enthusiastic consent is always essential for every sexual activity.

What are your favorite techniques for communication? Share below in the comments!

couple communicating openly and honestly

couple communicating openly and honestly | Image: Supplied

Beyond the Position: Focus on Pleasure

The position is only a small part of the equation. The overall experience includes things like foreplay, the setting, mood, and the level of connection you have with your partner. A little romance and intimacy can go a long way! It will enhance the pleasure tenfold.

Think about:

  • The ambiance: Dim lights, candles, music…set the mood!
  • Foreplay: This is not something to skip. It makes all the difference in the world.
  • Connection: Feeling emotionally connected to your partner can amplify the experience.

What are some of your favorite ways to enhance the mood for intimacy?

romantic couple setting the mood for intimacy

romantic couple setting the mood for intimacy | Image: Supplied

Finding What Works for YOU: It's Your Journey

Ultimately, the "best" oral sex position is the one that feels best for you and your partner. There's no one-size-fits-all approach. Experiment! It's a big part of the fun. It is a learning curve. Don't be discouraged if things don't go perfectly at first. Be patient with each other and yourselves! Some people find the 69 a total blast, others find it completely uncomfortable. That's perfectly okay! The goal is mutual pleasure and a strong connection. What's your favorite oral sex position and why?

happy couple embracing

happy couple embracing | Image: Supplied

The most important aspect of intimacy is not the position, but the connection.

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